Business Matters Police Blotter

Morro Bay Police Blotter

• March 26: At Morro Bay High, a stepmother reported her evil stepdaughter as a runaway. In an unrelated case, on the 24th, police took a report of suspected child abuse at the high school.

• March 25: A woman at Morro Rock told police that someone got into her unlocked car and stole credit cards and $150 cash, and the scoundrel had already charged up $500, a case when a crappy credit score comes in handy. In an unrelated case, someone turned in a Bank of America debit card they found on Morro Bay Blvd.

• March 25: Police towed off two cars from the Dunes and Market area ‘cause it’d been more than 6 months since the DMV had gotten its pound of flesh.

• March 24: Police responded at 1:10 p.m. to a disturbance at the community center. Logs indicated they booked a 45-year-old buttered fellow into County Jail for suspicion of being toasted in public and of course resisting arrest. However, at 1:38 p.m. police arrested apparently the same dude for alleged shoplifting at Albertsons, as the guy’s apparently got a doppelganger or jail ain’t what it used to be.

• March 24: Police responded at 9:55 a.m. to Quintana and MBB where a tree jumped in front of a car. 

• March 23: At 8:38 p.m. police contacted a regular customer, 65, and the forshnicked chick was nicked.

• March 23: Police responded at 4:35 p.m. to the 1100 block of West St., to referee a most un-neighborly dispute. All was quiet on the West St., front when they left.

• March 23: A citizen in the 200 block of Capri told police his or her mail was stolen, which is a federal offense, though not yet the death penalty, hey there’s an idea…

• March 23: Police at the high school put the squeeze on one hooligan who gave up another miscreant so as to avoid criminal proceedings, for as Confucius never said, “It is best to be stool pigeon than jail bird.”

• March 23: Police responded to the 2100 block of Laurel for a report of a retired State parole officer’s badge being stolen, or maybe it’s lost? It’s badge No. 3700 in case anyone should brandish it at you. In an unrelated case, someone in the 900 block of Quintana had the tags stolen off his travel trailer.

• March 22: Police responded at 11:42 a.m. to Tidelands Park restroom where someone stole a “Public Restroom” sign, proving once again that people will steal anything.

• March 22: At 9:30 a.m. at Main and Harbor, two cars went boom, and one said bye-bye, in a hit-n-split non-injury crash.

• March 22: Police responded at 8:30 a.m. to the 400 block of Fresno for a domestic dustup. Logs indicated they arrested a 24-year-old man for suspicion of domestic violence and threw him into the County re-education facility.

• March 22: A citizen in the 800 block of Pacific reported something hinkey is going on with his neighbor, sounds like a case for the department’s new spy drone.

• March 21: Someone at an experienced-folks home on Teresa Drive reported money missing from his or her wallet.

• March 21: An irate citizen came to the stationhouse to complain about a neighbor putting his stuff on his property. 

• March 20: Police caught up to a ruffian at City Park and arrested the cur, 46, for suspicion of domestic violence battery occurring the previous day also at the park, guess it’s time to close City Park now.

• March 20: Some graffidiot tagged a business in the 1000 block of Quintana. It read, “NA-MO” which rhymes with “A-HO.”

• March 20: At 3:47 a.m. police stopped what had to be a sitting duck in the 500 block of Allesandro. The driver, 32, was arrested for suspicion of possession of paraphernalia and of course driving on a toot. The passenger, 53, was popped for suspicion of having paraphernalia and “dangerous weapons,” which when one is honked, could be a gun, a knife or a safety pin for that matter.

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