Business Matters Police Blotter


Morro Bay

• Aug. 13: Police contacted some stumblebum at 5 p.m. in Lila Keiser Park. The hump, 63, was trudged off to the hoosegow for suspicion of being loaded.

• Aug. 13: Police responded to the 900 block of Ridgeway where a citizen reported some scoundrel stole his or her checks and has been laying hot paper all over town.

• Aug. 12: Police responded at 10:18 a.m. to a dustup in the 700 block of Harbor. A 41-year-old tosspot was tossed to the nick for suspicion of being potted.

• Aug. 11: Police responded at 8 p.m. to the 300 block of Atascadero Rd., for a disturbing fellow creating a disturbance that disturbed his neighbors. No arrest as cooler heads prevailed.

• Aug. 11: During an undisclosed call at 4:36 p.m. at Monterey and Harbor, the Gendarmes hooked up a 57-year-old, apparently irate, woman on suspicion of obstructing a police officer and of course resisting arrest. She was checking into the County chamber of horrors.

• Aug. 11: And in the tough luck category… police contacted a fellow in the 700 block of Quintana on some “municipal code violation” and of course ran his name through the system, only to find he has FTA warrant out of San Berdoo. The 50-year-old scofflaw was cited with more useless paper and released.

• Aug. 11: Someone turned in some .22 ammo that they were aiming to be rid of.

• Aug. 11: At 8:22 a.m. police contacted a regular customer, 41, in the 300 block of Embarcadero and arrested the bloke for some undisclosed drudgery.

• Aug. 10: At 7:40 a.m. police paid a wake up call to the homeless in Lila Keiser Park arresting three men and a woman for “illegal camping,” making even the creek no longer affordable housing. Before they left the park, officers contacted a Los Osos fellow, 28, who of course had a warrant and shared a checker cab to the hoosegow.

• Aug. 9: Cars were towed from the 700 block of Quintana, 400 block of Atascadero Rd., and 700 Pacific, ‘cause the DMV’s pound of flesh was over 6 months overdue and the beastocracy simply must be fed.

• Aug. 7: A disturbance was reported at 9:31 a.m. down on the Embarcadero. A harbor rat, 57, was arrested for illegally camping where the tourists can see him.

• Aug. 6: Someone turned in $300 cash they found in the 600 block of Embarcadero. Police have no leads on who lost it, so finder’s keepers! — after 30 days that is…

• Aug. 6: A disturbance was reported at 11:16 p.m. at Harbor and Embarcadero. A Clovis woman, 32, was nicked for suspicion of getting spanked in public, as she arrived on vacation and left on probation.

• Aug. 5: Police contacted a suspicious fellow in the 300 block of Embarcadero at 8:55 p.m. and he was arrested for suspicion of being higher than the stacks and paraphernalia, his stash apparently shot.

• Aug. 5: At 1 p.m. at South Bay and Quintana, police came across someone passed out in a roadside ditch. The toddy stricken fellow was deemed too sozzled to manage for himself and was arrested, a case of going from a life in the ditch to life’s a b*tch. 

• Aug. 5: The store dick at Rite Aid caught a woman allegedly helping herself with the 5-finger discount. 

• Aug. 5: Police contacted a suspicious man at 9:20 a.m. in the 1200 block of Embarcadero. The 25-year-old all star was arrested for suspicion of possessing heroin, meth, prescription pills and paraphernalia, two felony no-bail warrants and two FTA warrants, oh, and he’s on probation too. The master criminal was jailed; not to be seen again for about 3 to 5. 

• Aug. 4: Someone in the 600 block of Harbor reported that his or her license plate was stolen by some unknown scoundrel, and a few days later, someone reported finding a license plate, which evens out cosmically.

• Aug. 4: A man in the 500 block of Monterey reported suspicious circumstances — his motorcycle fell over while parked in his locked garage, nod doubt a case of the tricky kickstand.

• Aug. 4: Police caught another homeless woman, 57, in Lila Keiser Park and cite-released her for the violation of sleeping where they can’t collect a bed tax. 

• Aug. 4: A disturbance was reported at 8:38 a.m. in Bayshore Bluffs Park. The 28-year-old early bird was arrested for being a glowworm.

• Aug. 4: Police responded at 12:07 a.m. to the 1700 block of Main for a car crash. A sloppy fellow was arrested for suspicion of hit and running, on a toot to boot.

• Aug. 3: Police responded to the 100 block of Embarcadero where a man said someone’s stolen his dinghy. Police have no leads ‘til the harbor patrol finds it.

• Aug. 2: A citizen in the 500 block of Dawson said some scalawag stole her outdoor artwork and house number signs. In the 400 block of Fresno, someone’s flags were stolen. And in the 1100 block of Embarcadero a guy said the Yamika racks were stolen off his truck.

• Aug. 1: And as the crime wave continues… plants were stolen from the 800 block of Front St., vandalism was reported in the 700 block of MBB, and gasoline was sucked out of a car in the 900 block of Quintana.

• July 31: Police responded at 2:25 p.m. to Piney Way and Harbor for a car crash. Logs indicated the driver, a woman, “…had an odor of an alcoholic beverage on her breath,” according to logs. She was arrested for suspicion of driving stinky.

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